Audrey Beatrix: Hiatus

I've been so ill the past fortnight with a nasty cough that lingered and lingered, so I've been neglecting the Audrey blog dreadfully.

Being sick and looking after Audrey at the same time is tough - really tough. You're already at 100%, there's nothing more to give, and then you get ill and all of a sudden you're being pushed beyond your limits. Something has to give, and that something is usually sleep, and food, and rest - the very things that are important for getting well again!

Then when you finally feel better, you're overwhelmed with how behind you are with things.

We've had a busy couple of weeks despite the illness. We went out to Gavia with Aunty Katy and Uncle David, to see Nana and Grandad.

Showing off her pointing skills with Grandad Pop.

We've also had lots of friends round for our annual Fake Christmas celebration - where a group of us gather together for a not-really-Christmas dinner. Our friends Cori and Kat spent the whole weekend, and it has been so wonderful to see them and spend time with them.

The friends that were with us this weekend are like family. At the last Fake Christmas I was quite heavily pregnant, and this year Audrey was crawling about saying hi to everyone. Sometimes it's hard to believe that she's the one that was in that bump for all those months.

Today we're all on our own again, and we spent the morning playing around in the nursery, and cuddled up on the sofa feeding each other rice cakes. She has this sweet little giggle whenever she shares her food with me, holds it up to my mouth and tries to hold back a grin until I take a bite and she laughs and laughs.

I love her so much. I feel like it shouts out of me every moment I'm with her - IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou. I've waited for this all my life, and I'm still struck by it every time I get to say "my daughter" - every time I think of myself as a mum. When she reaches out to me, when she hugs me and tucks her face into the space between my neck and my shoulder, the way she looks when she's out of breath from laughing, the way she rubs her eyes when she's tired, the shy smile she has for strangers and the free and uninhibited way she dances and dances and dances.